ideas and inspiration for moms
She was 17 months old when this photo was taken – our lively, beautiful, firstborn…the one who changed our lives forever.
And now she is 3 (THREE!). She is chewing gum, riding bikes, chasing dreams.
Yesterday, she said: “When I am fifteen, I am going to drive our car – and you and daddy are going to ride in the back.”
Welcome to “Tuesday Tours: What’s Happening on the Web” where I serve as your tour guide and showcase the best contests, freebies, deals, and reads for moms on the web…all in one convenient location.
Nicole (momtrends) is hosting a Baby Shower Giveaway and is giving away 2 prize packages to expectant mamas. Enter before Feb. 28.
Looking for a talented blog designer with an impressive portfolio and a beautiful heart? After a short hiatus due to the birth of her 2nd son, Emily is now back in business: Emily June Design Studio.
Leigh {Marvelous Kiddo} is offering companies a chance to “audition” for a FREE 1-month ad on her blog. Deadline to Apply: Feb. 26.
Steph says that Celebrity Moms are looking too hot after having a baby {Real Moms Guide}. *I agree.*
LauraD writes about: Growing Smart Kids {Heart of the Matter Online}.
Some advice from John Haydon: 13 Ways To Get Your Blog Posts Retweeted.
Lisa Belkin asks: Does Pregnancy Affect Memory? {The New York Times}.
Oh Amanda just totally inspired me to buy or borrow some audio pictures books: Top Ten Audio Books.
These Black Bean Breakfast Burritos look mighty tasty {goodLife eats}.
I don’t sew, but if I did…I think I’d want to make this Something Special Card + Envelope {Sew, Mama, Sew!}.
I would also make a tie shirt {Saltwater Kids}.
Crafty and Creative Cara {The Picky Apple} makes Melt My Heart Crayons.
I want to have a wall of inspirational quotes {The Happy Housewife}.
You will laugh when you see this Facebook-inspired birthday card {Gramkin Paper Studio}.
Watching this beautiful commercial made me shiver: To Their Moms, They’ll Always Be Kids.
Planning an Olympics-themed party? Serve up these Ice Cream Cone Olympic Torches {Make and Takes}.
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*** If you have a contest or an announcement that you think might be a good fit for Tuesday Tours, e-mail me at stephanie@metropolitanmama.net.
Here are 3 more questions you asked…and my answers.
Mary asks: Have any tips on dealing with separation anxiety in an attached baby? It’s not that I want to leave my child with strangers, but it would be nice if her grandparents could hold her once in a while…
Um. Not really. Because…we don’t really leave our baby. Ever. She goes with me everywhere. To church. To parties. To parks. Everywhere. If you see me, you’ll probably see her. On my hip. Leaning against my chest. Or in a carrier.
We actually just recently began leaving her for a few hours here and there with my in-laws (she’s 11-months-old). She didn’t cry or whimper even a smidge…and that’s because she knows them very, very well.
I have found that the more ACTIVELY involved a person is in my baby’s life, the more she responds positively to them (that’s obvious, I know). And by actively involved, I don’t mean once a week/month.
After all, I often think to myself: Would *I* want to be passed around, hugged, and kissed by strangers and acquaintances (even if they go by “grandpa” and “grandma”)? No, I would not.
Although I don’t have any fantastic advice to share, I do have a bit of encouragement. It gets easier as you child gets older. My 3-year-old, for example, has a much better grasp of relationships and time…and can more easily slide into play with relatives that she hasn’t seen in a little while.
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Staci asks: Tell me how you get your girls to sleep!! I beg of you! I’m curious to find out the magical way to get babies to sleep through the night!
Ready for the magic formula? Pat your baby’s tummy. Sing Hush Bye Baby 3 times, while standing on one foot. Done. Just kidding!
Before I answer, I have to clarify some terms first. In our house, “sleeping through the night” simply means that everyone in our house is getting a full night’s rest. This happens almost every night in our house…except when Tim and I stay up waaaayyyy too late (which we are guilty of).
We have never followed any sleep books and we don’t support the cry-it-out method.
What we do is this:
One resource that I would recommend is The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pantley. She shares a whole slew of ideas for a variety of different situations.
I also highly recommend this excellent post by PhD in Parenting – Gentle Baby and Toddler Sleep Tips.
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Marcela asks: Tell me, what do you do when you are feeling down? What are some ways you handle stress?
I run. I talk to my husband. I pray. I make lists. And then I talk to my husband again.
YOUR TURN: Do YOU have any separation anxiety tips to share with Mary? Do YOU know any magical secrets for getting babies to sleep? How do YOU handle stress?
Here are 3 more questions you asked…and my answers.
Ashleigh asks: How do you keep the love alive in your marriage? You have such an obvious love for your husband, and I want to know how you keep things strong.
Thanks for pointing out our “obvious love,” Ashleigh. We really do have a fun, lively marriage. Sure, we have our moments (like tonight, when he came home THREE hours later than expected from a 4-wheeling adventure…), but – all in all – I can’t imagine living this life beside anyone else. Tim is funny, hard-working, heroic, handsome, and full of heart.
I could write a whole book on this stuff, but let’s see…we keep things strong by:
Oh, and we don’t go on weekly date nights.
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Marina asks: What do you think of home schooling?
I haven’t written about this much, but I was actually homeschooled through grade 8 and have many positive memories of the experience. I was able to excel academically and also stay very social (through ballet, soccer, volunteering, theater, etc.). By the time I entered high school, I had a pretty solid confidence that helped me navigate those traditionally tumultuous years without too much heartache.
As of right now, we are planning on homeschooling our girls through the early years (at a minimum), but we will reevaluate every year based on our children’s dispositions and aptitudes, where we happen to be living, what our school options are, etc.
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Lisa asks: What is your favorite food?
I can’t name just one! Salad with lots of toppings. Homemade bread just out of the oven. Fresh-squeezed juice. Dark Chocolate. Perfectly ripe fruit. Cheesecake.
YOUR TURN: How do YOU keep the love alive in your marriage? Are YOU homeschooling…or have you considered it ? What are YOUR favorite foods?
Here are 3 more questions you asked…and my answers.
Jenny asks: If you had to decide today, do you think you would have more children?
Sara asks: Do you have a desire to have a boy and if yes, do you think that affects your decision to have baby #3?
The answer is Yes. Yes, we plan to have more children. It’s a funny thing. When I was pregnant with our second daughter, we thought that perhaps two might be “it.” But something changed in my heart and in Tim’s heart shortly after her birth. At the exact same time, we both came to the conclusion that – yes – we do want more. How many more? I’m not quite sure. I guess we’ll take it one a time (although we’re leaning toward 3, maybe 4…).
RE: having a boy. If we have another girl, Tim and I will be overwhelmingly happy. If we have a boy, we will be the same. There is definitely a part of both of us that would love to experience parenting a boy, but parenting girls is pretty incredible too:
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Becca asks: I’m curious if you listen to music while you run.
Up until this year, I ran to the “music” of my beating heart and my tennis shoes pounding the pavement…and there’s definitely something to be said for that. I pray. I think. I enjoy the silence and the whisperings of nature and my neighborhood.
Then, my brother-in-law gave me an ipod shuffle this past Christmas…and there’s definitely something to be said for running with music too. It’s motivating, energizing, and I think I run faster with music.
So…I usually listen to music when running solo (but not always). When I am running with Tim and/or the girls, we talk as we run.
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Sara Greco asks: Have you ever considered a home birth?
As a matter of fact, I have been thinking about that a lot lately…and I most definitely will consider a home birth next time around. The concept appeals to me immensely, but there is much to consider (and we’d have to find the right midwife).
If we opt not to have a home birth, I feel confident and at peace about delivering at my local birth center. It is nothing short of amazing.
YOUR TURN: How many children do YOU want to have? Do YOU listen to music when you workout? Have you had a home birth…or would you consider it in the future?
Here are 3 more questions you asked…and my answers.
Dorothy asks: What is your favorite flavor of cake?
In general, I’m not much of a fan of cake. I’m the girl who will politely decline wedding cake…not because I’m on a diet…but because I don’t like it. Especially cakes with heavy layers of frosting. Ick! I prefer to scrape off the frosting before eating.
All that said, I DO love cheesecake and apple crisp (especially when served with vanilla bean ice cream).
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Vanessa asks: How do you handle naps for both your girls?
My 3-year-old hasn’t napped for about a year (maybe longer…). My 11-month-old typically takes one nap per day, for about 45 minutes. I realize that this may shock and surprise many of you because I hear stories all of the time about kids napping happily for 3 hours until age 5. More power to ya!
Tim & I have come to the conclusion that all children are different and our girls just don’t need the long naps that so many of the “sleep experts” recommend. And that’s 100% fine with us. They are happy, content girls who sleep well at night so we have no complaints.
We don’t have set “nap times” or “sit-in-a-crib-and-be-quiet” times. We take a more laid-back approach and tend to let our girls lead the way. If it’s a struggle to *make them* take a nap, then why force the issue? That’s the way we see it.
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Joy asks: How did your mom raise six of you and you end up being such a confident, well-rounded woman?
Well, first of all, thanks so much for the compliment.
For those of you who don’t know, there are indeed 6 of us – five girls, one boy. I am the third child, a middle child.
Here is a not-at-all-recent picture of me with my mom and four sisters. It was taken circa 2000 (I think it’s high time for a family photo shoot, don’t you think? Perhaps we’ll do that this summer…we’re going to have a mini “reunion” of sorts).
There are many things that my mom did right. A few that come to mind include limiting TV (we didn’t even own a TV until I was 8-ish), homeschooling, and encouraging many of my dreams [my parents let me travel across the world to Bangladesh and Pakistan when I was a freshman in high school, for example].
Other things that I admire about my mom: She had 5 (FIVE!) home births and she breastfed all six of us for a year or more…in a time when both of those things were generally frowned upon by the culture. Love that.
YOUR TURN: What is YOUR favorite flavor of cake (and do you like frosting)? How do YOU handle naps with your kids? How many kids are in your family and what do you admire about your mom?
Here are 4 questions you asked…and my answers.
Jo-Lynne asks: How do you juggle everything that you do and still stay sane?
Who said anything about sanity? (Just Kidding).
I think my answer would have to be my husband Tim. He is my best friend – my friend above all other friends. I tell him everything. We laugh and dream and work together. And speaking of work, he works hard. He’s a hands-on dad. He willingly scrubs bathrooms, mops floors, gives baths, makes dinners, and plays with the girls…daily.
I also want to give credit to my energetic and loving mother-in-law. She comes over twice a week to play with the girls in the afternoon and they adore her (and so do I).
Also – I say “no, thank you” – A LOT. No to Mary Kay parties. No to nightly commitments. No to volunteer positions and new money-paying gigs that aren’t aligned with my goals. No to product review offers that don’t fit who I am. I’m not one to feel guilty about saying no. If it isn’t good and healthy for me and my family and our goals, then…no, thank you.
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Naomi asks: I want to know what your favorite red lipstick is.
Of the ones I’ve tried, it would have to be CoverGirl Cabernet Satin 855. It’s a dark, knock-out red…and it’s long-lasting – perfect for a mom who gives kisses to her baby all day long since it doesn’t rub off.
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Jenn asks: Does your 3-year old sleep in a crib or in a toddler bed or in a regular bed or what?
She sleeps on a full size mattress on the floor. We’ve never actually used a crib. She slept in our room until about 9/10 months. At that point, we transitioned her (seamlessly, I might add) to a mattress on the floor in her room.
It’s a wonderful arrangement because it gives her freedom (she can get up to go to the bathroom, etc.), but it’s also quite safe. And the biggest bonus is that if she is sick or wakes up and wants one of us, we can just lay right down beside her and get some sleep ourselves. It’s awesome.
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Kari asks: How do you keep your 3 year old from talking in a VERY loud voice ALL DAY LONG? mine does this:)
The assumption is that my 3-year-old does not talk in a VERY loud voice ALL DAY LONG. That is an erroneous assumption. Much to Tim’s dismay (he has been known to complain of premature hearing loss because of it…), she actually screams [in high-pitched, soprano tones] and talks loudly…daily. Working on that.
You know what though? It’s a very.very.very small flaw so I only worry about it a very little bit. I’d much rather her be happily loud than be lying, selfish, defiant, etc. All in all, she is a sweet, caring, gentle little girl with a compassionate heart…and a big voice.
YOUR TURN: What is YOUR favorite red lipstick? Where does YOUR preschooler sleep? How do YOU keep your preschooler from screaming/talking loudly?
